Thursday, January 16, 2014

I Had A Dream

I generally tune out whenever anyone starts a sentence with “I had the weirdest dream last night,” because what’s coming is usually gonna bore the shit out of me. Luckily for me my dreams are much more interesting than yours so here goes. I had a dream the other night where I was talking to a friend about how shoe sales had dropped "precipitously" since 1995. He didn't believe me. I told him I heard it on a podcast recently. It got pretty heated. I woke up and immediately grabbed my phone to look up shoe sales in the last twenty years. Turns out it was all dream horse shit. From what I can tell shoe sales have remained constant, if not grown since 1995. I was unable to find a chart that had the total number of shoes sold since then, but all the charts I was able to find show steady growth. I went through my old podcasts to see if I could find anything about the shoe industry to no avail. I was about ready to give in and text my friend to concede the point on the shoes. Then I remembered that the guy from the dream was just a guy in my dream. I didn’t know him. He wasn’t even a dream version of someone I knew. He was just some stupid dream stranger I’ll never have to see in real life. So I felt better and went back to sleep and had a dream that I got a sail for my bike. It was pretty neat.

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