|Writing a book? Effective!|
|Lazily cashing in your father's name? Highly effective!|
My mother bought the book for me when I was a highly ineffective teen. Throughout the book there are a number of tips on how to improve your efficacy. Seven I think. Unfortunately I don’t remember any of those. That’s why to this day, I’m not a particularly effective teen. However, The book did have something that I do remember. Along the bottom of the pages it had all these little quotes. Some were supposed to be inspirational, some were supposed to make you think, and then there was the one about King George. I guess the point of that was to make us always be thinking about what history will make of us as effective teens. Because god forbid we write the wrong thing in our diary then generations of effective teens will be laughing at us for as long people read silly self-help books.
|I'd make fun of this guy for keeping a diary, but I'm writing a blog. So whatever.|
This is dumb for another reason. It’s a typical arrogant American thing to think that everyone would be waiting with baited breath to hear what’s going on with America. That’s something that we all still seem to think. That the whole of the world is pretty eager to see what’s going on with us and doesn’t give a shit about too much else. America is a pretty lady or a dude with abs taking selfie after selfie and then constantly monitoring how many likes it racks up on social media. What if by some crazy set of circumstances King George was able to find out that America had just declared its independence. Maybe he still just wouldn’t much care. America, was at that point, just a few colonies that was part of an empire that was about a third of the planet. The king has to care about everything that goes on in an entire empire on any given day? I’m not sure if you remember the late eighteenth century, but there was a lot going on with the Brits. They were irrevocably damaging native populations all over the globe. One king can't possibly keep all that squared away. For Christ's sake cut the guy some slack. He's a busy man. I read (just now to make this point) that The British Empire may have consisted of 192 separate counties, protectorates, and territories. So something happens to one part of that, that's only 0.005% of it. If I have $19,000, and I drop fifty cents that's probably not making it in my diary either. Just because a fax comes through that that one of its many countries is making some noise the king can't drop everything and spend his whole day writing in his diary about it. These days America is a country that has a bunch of shit going on. Maybe if tomorrow Guam kicked up some dust I bet that wouldn’t make it to the top spot of Obama’s diary. Maybe the king had other larger countries to worry about more.
|British Empire: circa before the sun set on it|
It doesn’t take much to realize that this is one of those too good to be true quotes that’s just false. It never happened, but that’s not the reason this doesn't matter. The reason this is dumb is for a far more important reason. We’re Americans. We don’t give a shit what some limey in a fancy hat thinks. USA! USA! USA!
|Eagle says: Fuck you diary keeping Redcoat!|