Thursday, August 21, 2014

Ninja Please

There was a story that caught my attention earlier in the week. Not sure if you heard about it, but there was a lady at the University of Alabama who sent out a Snapchat with N word in it. Specifically that her sorority had none, and presumably this was a cause of exclamation points and celebration. It made it's way around the internet. Now she's got kicked out of her sorority.

The Snapchat in question
I don’t use Snapchat. I downloaded it for a week. Then I realized i was in my thirties and nobody would want or need to send Snapchats my way. I’m not sure if I fully understand the point of it anyway. I thought it was just a newer social networking site. Turns out it’s a photo sharing app that automatically deletes the pictures you send before they get you into trouble. I don’t know what experience other people have had with it, but I can imagine that this lady is not a satisfied customer in that regard. She probably would prefer one the many drunken shots of her flashing the party had survived and this one had been forgotten, but unfortunately for her it didn’t work out that way.

Someone's about to get a one star review
There’s been a minor shitstorm surrounding this. Minor because theres a lot of shitstorms going on right now, and all the other shitstorms have mostly eclipsed this one. As far as the incident itself goes, I don’t really care. I feel sorry for a lot of people, can't say that she’s one of them. It’s nothing personal. I think the reactions and the apologies are a whole lot more telling.

Her sorority reacted pretty strongly. They kicked her out right quick for bringing shame on their house. Then they pointed out that they in fact have a handful of black members. In fact they just offered bids to 21 black pledges they said in their own defense. Out of like 2000. So take that haters! Maybe she would have been better off had the picture read Chi O got 0.0105% Niggas. That’s practically the same thing, but they really can’t get angry if the math is correct. But nonetheless the sorority and the university of Alabama are shocked. Shocked that one of its members would act like this. After all the sororities at this particular university have a legally enforced history of inclusion that dates back almost one year.

Let’s hop in the way-back machine and see what things were like in the groovy days of September 2013

Some have said that this young lady is innocent. That this is all one big misunderstanding and we should all just calm the fuck down. Some in the media have reported that this is silly. She wasn’t trying to type the N word. You see she was just trying to type the word “ninja”. Ninja is a non racially charged word. It’s a slang term for sorority pledges that means a lady who isn’t your first choice. So she was just trying to convey that her chapter didn’t have any ladies they didn’t want. They were all top notch. No harm, no foul, right?

Diversity in action

I don’t know who put this out there. Wether it was the lady in question herself or just someone who’s a fan. But this explanation is not just horse shit, it’s the most horse shit that’s ever been. This is so bad that it makes the lady look even worse. If you have a smart phone you may know that it very rarely assumes you mean the N word. I can count on zero hands the amount of times my phone has been like, “hey, noticed you hadn’t called anyone a racial slur in a while, let me change that for you.” People like to heap a lot of blame on their autocorrect feature. It can lead to a lot of embarrassing mistakes in texts, I'll be the first to admit. But you have to give it credit where credit is due. It's always been really kind to me on racial slur front.I’ve had an iPhone for over a year. It still usually assumes I meant to say that I don’t “ducking give a shot.” I was texting a friend when I first got my phone and wanted to refer to a guy as “the cuntiest” person I had met. My phone changed it to “cubiesky.” My phone was so put off by my language that it changed it to complete gibberish instead of letting me say what I originally had typed. Just now my computer changed it to “contest” three times before it let me type “cuntiest.” You know how many times you have to type the N word before your phone just assumes that’s what you mean? A whole hell of a lot. So this lady’s defense is that she wasn’t trying to say the N word, it's just that she always uses the N word.

What happens when you try to type the N word

I have to say that is one of most ducking horse shot defenses I’ve ever heard.

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