It’s been another week. I watched some more Trek. One that I had never seen before, and it was a real stinker. It’s called Mudd’s Women if you’re watching along at home. I think I’ve been going a little nuts with the recaps. So from now on that portion is going to be a lot shorter. Unless I feel like writing more, then it’ll probably be longer. Who knows.
This is one of those episodes where I think there was supposed to be a moral lesson in it, but I’ll be damned if I could figure it out. It was muddled as shit. Maybe that’s where they got the name, Mudd’s Women.
The gang is chasing a ship, but for no reason. The guy doesn’t want to talk to the Enterprise, but the Enterprise wants to talk to them a lot. So they chase them into an asteroid belt and kidnap them via transporter before the ship explodes. Kinda fucked.
It’s a fat Irish guy and three pretty ladies. Every male member of the ship loses their shit around the women because they have some kind of super powers that enamor men.
|His name is Mudd|
Kirk is angry because they lost a few of their very essential lithium crystals chasing and then subsequently saving this ship. They don’t trust the Irish guy, the women are seducing everyone, and they need crystals. So they head to a mining colony that harvests lithium crystals and they get to the bottom of the Irish captain, who is acting like the Notre Dame mascot.
|Vavavoom! Straight from Planet Wheel of Fortune|
He, of course, was a liar. Turns out he gave them a fake name. His name is Mudd and he’s committed a bunch of crimes and is on the lamb. The women are hiding something too because they’re really worried about being able to get to their husbands they were promised to. Which seems a little weird. It’s not even like these were awesome guys they were promised to because they end up striking a deal with the miners so they can have them as husbands. So they'll marry just anyone.
The women it turns out are taking PEDs to be this sexy. It’s not just those sick sequined dresses. They’re taking drugs that turn them from homely to hella sexy. So that’s what’s bringing all the boys to the space-yard. When they don’t take the pills they end up old and ugly, but still wearing sequined evening wear.
|This is what self-doubt looks like I guess?|
Kirk figures this out (of course) and gives one of the ladies a placebo. She ends up sexy again after taking the sugar pill. So the pills didn’t do anything it just gave them confidence. She goes off to live with the miner, Kirk gets his crystals, and Mudd gets hauled off to space jail. They all have a laugh at the end.
YES! With the exception of The Naked Time most of these have been really bad. I’m not the wokest guy on earth, but Jesus Christ we have another episode wherein a woman who is an object of revulsion because there’s a physical flaw. Most these physical flaws are just being too long in the stardates.
This whole episode gets kicked off because the Enterprise is chasing people. That’s bizarre. I know Mudd ended up being a criminal, but they didn’t know that. I don’t think the Enterprise has jurisdiction out in the middle of nowhere. They just see a ship and decide to chase it and it gets destroyed in the process. Not cool.
The scene where they use the computer as a lie detector and it calls out the crew for being too horny was also something else. The computer wasn’t even there to monitor the crew, it was there to see if Mudd was lying. Then it says oh and by the way, all the guys on this ship are horny AF. Not cool broputer.
Can we talk about what a shitty doctor Bones is? He is not great. One of the Mudd women appear to be radioactive and he just goes “hmmm. Weird.” Then just ignores it. He doesn’t seem remotely concerned. If not concerned, he should at least be curious. Maybe whip out a tricorder and see what’s what. Bashir would be champing at the bit to get to the bottom of whatever it was. And Crusher would have done all the while looking better than any of Mudd’s women.
Bones told the Mudd woman that he didn’t trust himself to examine her. Jesus. Do your fucking job Bones. You sir, are doing harm. At one point in the episode, he asks “are they actually more beautiful pound for pound, measurement for measurement or is it that they just act sexy?” Dude what the hell are you talking about you dumb shit. You are a doctor. Get to the bottom of this.
This seems like the episode was trying to make a point, but I’ll be damned if I know what it was. I guess it’s if you believe in yourself then you take a bunch of years off your face? I honestly can’t tell you what I was supposed to learn with this one. It was a garbage episode.
Also, Mudd just stops being Irish at one point. Nobody dies and that’s a good thing I suppose. I would not recommend this one. I’d give it roughly zero stars.
Worse Trek: TNG' The Outrageous Okona
I don’t know if I’d say it’s worse, but it’s also bad. The Enterprise stumbles on a space pirate named Okona. He also has powers of seduction manages to bed just about the entire female portion of the Enterprise.
Better Trek: DS9's The Abandoned
I think I’ve recommended this one before, but it’s really good and you should watch it again. I don’t really know if they’re that connected. But Odo does find a baby Jem’Hdar. Who does rely on drugs to get through his day, and also he was going to be delivered into the servitude of The Founders. It’s thin, but it’s all I got. I’m sure there was an episode that is more connected to this one, but I can’t really think of one now. Regardless, I’d say you should watch just about any other episode of any other Trek before you venture into this one. It’s bad.
Next week is What Little Girls Are Made Of, which sounds like a trouble episode.